I Blog Because...

I am a wife, a mom, a servant, a seeker and a follower of Christ. I am blogging to chronicle my own journey with God with the hope to inspire others to deepen their relationship with Him. Perhaps my mistakes and blunders will make you chuckle. Or, maybe, my disappointments, mistakes and learnings will speak to your heart. I often write at night, so forgive the grammatical mistakes and misspellings. This is a place for me to empty my mind and thoughts, with the hope of one day blessing my 2 girls with the raw honesty about life from their mom. I invite you to journey with me and share in my joys and sorrows as I seek to know my Lord. Proverbs 8:17 "I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me."



Monday, August 10, 2009


What if…

What if…we actually had the courage to ask?
What if…we were not afraid to ask the hard questions?
What if…we asked the One who had the answers?
What if…He gave us an unexpected answer?
What if…it does not make sense to the rest of the world?
What if…we knew it would not be easy?
What if…it was not the popular decision?
What if…we knew in the deepest place of our soul it was what we were created to do?
What if…it meant giving up your comfort?
What if…it felt like leaping off a tall building?
What if…you were asked to drop your nets and come follow?
What if…you were called?
What if…you knew His good, pleasing and perfect will for your life?
What if…you did nothing?
What if…you tried to drown out the sound of the call because of fear?
What if…you didn’t have all of the answers?
What if…you leaped?
What if…you obeyed?

What if you did?

Friday, June 19, 2009

What an amazing retreat time today. God always shows up and reveals Himself when we seek Him. It was a beautiful afternoon at Susquehanna State Park where He once again led me beside still waters...

26 I gave an account of my ways and you answered me; teach me your decrees. 27 Cause me to understand the way of your precepts, that I may meditate on your wonderful deeds. 28 My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word. 29 Keep me from deceitful ways; be gracious to me and teach me your law. 30 I have chosen the way of faithfulness; I have set my heart on your laws.
Psalm 119:26-30

Every Season

Every evening sky, an invitation
To trace the patterned stars
And early in July, a celebration
For freedom that´s ours
And I notice You
In children´s games
In those who watch them from the shade
Every drop of sun is full of fun & wonder
You´re summer

And even when the trees have just surrendered
To the harvest time
Forfeiting their leaves in late September
And sending us inside
Still I notice You when change begins
And I´m braced for colder winds
I´ll offer thanks for what has been & what´s to come
You´re autumn

And everything in time & under heaven
Finally falls asleep
Wrapped in blankets white, all creation
Shivers underneath
And still I notice you
When branches crack
And in my breath on frosted glass
Even now in death, You open doors for life to enter
You´re winter

And everything that is new has bravely surfaced
Teaching us to breathe
What was frozen through is newly purposed
Turning all things green
So it´s with You
And how You make me new
With every season´s change
And so it´ll be
As You´re re-creating me
Summer, autumn, winter, spring

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Look, a new day has begun

"Daylight, I must wait for the sunrise, I must think of a new life, and I musn't give in. Look, a new day had begun." Profound words from the song "Memories" from the musical Cats. I love musicals, anything from Bye-Bye Birdie to High School Musical! For some reason, I awoke this morning with the song "Memories" sounding in my head. That's a crazy way to begin the day I suppose, and a frightening glimpse into the psyche of Jenny Krichton, but it did direct me to thoughts of my God. I must think of a new life, and I musn't give in. Today is beginning differently for me. I am committing each new day to God by spending time with Him first. No Good Morning America, no a.m. race for the coffee, no Facebook, no Weather Channel, no quick email check on my phone. Nope, nope, nope! The first book of the Bible begins with these words, "In the beginning God..." This is my new morning mantra and I musn't give in! In the beginning, God.

Change my heart oh God. Make it ever true.
Change my heart oh God. May I be like you.

You are the Potter, I am the clay;
Mold me and make me, This is what I pray.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Full Exposure to the Son

I am eagerly anticipating an exam on Friday. It is going to be a tough exam for me and I am not sure I am at all ready or prepared. Ever had that feeling? Well, this is not a college exam or a physical exam. Friday is the day I slip away to be alone with God and allow Him in to examine my heart.

Socrates declared that "the unexamined life is not worth living." A regular spiritual examination and full exposure to the Son is something that has become essential in my life. It's the prayer of David: "Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." (Psalm 139:23-24)

In our home, we regularly take out the garbage and clean out the refrigerator, and yes, even pick up the dog waste in the yard! The question is, do we really have the courage to do the dirty work needed in our own lives? Will we take the time to be still before God and allow Him to expose what is rotting in our own lives and then take the trash out to the garbage can?

I have been challenged by the book, Soul Revolution, by John Burke, which suggests a full spiritual inventory. "The goal is to bring everything into God's light so that he can remove the hidden things fully." He suggests that we pray David's prayer (Psalm 139:23-24) and then write down anything that comes to mind that you need to confess before God. Then listen and respond to the Holy Spirit. I encourage you to journal some action steps to take. What does God want to change? What is God trying to do in your life right now? When we enter His presence with humility and listen for His voice, it will become clear.

Growth begins when we can be a naked soul, fully exposed before the lover of our souls.

Search me, test me, and lead me O Lord...

One more day til T.G.I.F.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Dominican Mission Team - April 2009
We have been changed to bring change

This is a beautiful picture of light in the darkness. I was honored to be part of a mission team to the Dominican Republic in October 2008 and April 2009. God is at work in the lives of the Dominican people! He is the God of this City and He is the King of these people.

Are you following your GPS (God Positional System)?

Are you following your GPS (God Positional System)?

Have you ever had to follow someone in the car to a destination? If the person says, “follow me” you presume that he or she knows exactly where they are going. You have confidence in their ability to lead you safely on a driving journey to your destination. We follow people, directional road signs as well as the latest fashion trends and fad diets without much thought or hesitation, don’t we?

My husband recently gave me the wonderful gift of a GPS system since I have no inherent sense of direction. I now trust and follow the voice of a stranger with a British accent to navigate my every turn so that I can arrive home safely! Whose voice are you tuned into? Whom are you following?

For the first twenty-eight years of my life I was not finely tuned into hearing God’s voice. In fact, a better way to say it is that I tuned God out completely. I am so grateful for a loving God who never gave up on me and worked in my life even through the seasons of disobedience. In 1996, I professed my faith in Jesus Christ and have been learning day by day to know Him and to follow Him. Friends, we are all on a journey with Christ, never arriving at the destination, as God always has more in store for us. He is asking us to follow Him to a place beyond our comprehension at present. God has already chartered your course. He has a plan. Are you willing to say to Jesus, “lead on, I will follow?”

There have been times in my life when I have felt an undeniable nudge from Jesus to get up and go follow Him. I must admit I too often respond like the man walking along the road who encountered Jesus in Luke 9:61. He said, "I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say good-by to my family." I have too many “but firsts” which impede my following and going beyond with Jesus. Sometimes it’s fear which paralyzes my ability to move forward on the journey. At other times, I simply fail to walk in faith and ask God for more information before I’ll take the first step. However, these verses from Isaiah speak deeply to me: “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” Jesus is on the move and is constantly doing a new thing! I want to perceive it and go beyond.

Over the past several years God has asked me to go far beyond my comfort zone. He called me to leave my profession to follow Him and serve on the staff team in Children’s Ministry. He called me to follow Him and to trust Him with difficult medical decisions, not once – but twice, which ultimately brought about healing. He called me to serve on the mission field in the Dominican Republic this past October to serve kids and the church of Monte Cristi. He is now calling me to follow Him on a return mission trip to Monte Cristi. My relationship with Jesus is deeper and richer than I could have ever imagined. I will follow Him wherever He leads me and I will journey with Him to infinity and beyond.

What is your next step or leap? I pray that you will listen for the gentle whisper or sense the tap on the shoulder from Jesus. Do you not perceive it? “Come, follow me.”

Grocery Store Blessings

Look! There it is, when you least suspect it...a blessing. Jesus is at work in our every day lives, even in the mundane tasks. Oh, if I could just have the 20/20 vision to see Him at work and to experience life with Him, moment by moment! My day began in a hurried manner as I dashed off to the grocery store to purchase sodas for a Children's Ministry Luncheon meeting. I was running behind schedule, battling a headache and fatigue and trying to quickly load the cases of soda in my car. In those moments, when we find ourselves racing against the clock, every little thing goes wrong, doesn't it? The paper carton split on one of the sodas, the plastic bag ripped which held the iced-teas AND the trunk was filled with junk. I barely had room for all of the drinks to fit! Of course, I am now mad at myself for not purchasing the drinks over the weekend As I loaded the last bottle in the trunk with a "huff" and was about to run the cart across the lot to the cart return like a gold medal sprinter, when a woman stopped in front of me. She had the most delightful smile, looked me in the eye and said in the kindest voice, "can I take this cart for you? I'd be happy to take it up with me." I said, "yes, thank you so much for your kindness" and drove off to my meeting...a changed person. You see, the kindness and gentle nature of this stranger reminded me of someone. She reminded me of someone I long to connect with, someone I desire in the deepest part of my soul, someone I desparately need in my life, moment by moment --- Jesus. Life can be hurried and overwhelming at times. We are a task oriented people with agendas, meetings, and a list of "gotta dos" that never seem to end. We can feel as if we are being tossed about the waves in the ocean or that we are close to drowning at times. When we take our eyes off of Jesus and focus on our "gotta do lists" and other distractions this life throws our way, we sink.

I was teaching this past weekend about Peter walking on the water to Jesus. The kids are always fascinated by this story. I mean, come on...someone walking on water! That's cool! The part of the story which resonates most with me is when Peter, "of little faith," takes his eyes off of Jesus. He looks at the wind and the waves surrounding him and he begins to sink. I don't know about you, but I too often sink rather than walk. I get captured and caught up in my circumstances and busyness of life. I love the words in Matthew 14:30-31." Peter cries out, "Lord, save me!" Verse 31 goes on to say, "Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him." Peter took his eyes off of Jesus and focused in on his circumstances. Then, he began to sink.

Even when we fail to keep our eyes on our Savior, He is there to catch us. As undeserving as we are, He is there to rescue us. This morning, my poor time management skills most certainly warranted the stress I felt on that grocery store parking lot. Even though I didn't deserve it, my Savior showed up disguised as an older lady and showed me kindness. She pointed my gaze back on Jesus. I am forever grateful for our loving God!