I Blog Because...

I am a wife, a mom, a servant, a seeker and a follower of Christ. I am blogging to chronicle my own journey with God with the hope to inspire others to deepen their relationship with Him. Perhaps my mistakes and blunders will make you chuckle. Or, maybe, my disappointments, mistakes and learnings will speak to your heart. I often write at night, so forgive the grammatical mistakes and misspellings. This is a place for me to empty my mind and thoughts, with the hope of one day blessing my 2 girls with the raw honesty about life from their mom. I invite you to journey with me and share in my joys and sorrows as I seek to know my Lord. Proverbs 8:17 "I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me."



Monday, February 8, 2010

Ye, Myself and I

Snow plow? No plow as of 11:08 p.m. this Sunday night! At the moment, I am completely fine with the lack of attention from the State Highway Administration. Once the wall of snow is penetrated and shoved aside, I know that the world will move full speed ahead. It will be time to jump back inside of the giant hamster wheel and start running the race all over again. Do you ever feel like that? Maybe you feel like you're being chased by an avalanche or giant cartoon snowball. As I sit in silence, encased in a protective wall of white, I again recognize my need to be still. Why is that so difficult to do for some of us? Shouldn't I be doing something to try to get a little ahead? March is coming, Easter is coming. Move, move, move my inner being cries out!

Thankfully, the deepest part of my inner being is crying out and has a louder voice. I have allowed some time for examination before God and believe I have an answer for myself. You can call me, "ye of little faith" or you can call me "Ye" for short. Humiliating or humbling? I admit it to be both, but fortunately there is learning from this title. Faith is the very basis and foundation of my relationship with Jesus and yet it can be one of the most difficult things I wrestle with. I believe that Jesus is the Son of God, that He died and 3 days later rose from the dead, that He can heal the sick, transform lives, and even move mountains. I struggle with why I fail to have the faith to see how God will meet the needs of every day life. The unexpected expenses that creep in, job stresses, family matters, money stress, feelings of inadequacy, health issues or sickness.

And yet, how many stories are there in the Gospels of healings that happened just because an individual, simply in a child-like fashion, knew and believed that Jesus could heal the person they were concerned about? I can memorize scripture and attend Bible studies about these miracles, but if I don't have child-like faith, it means nothing in my own life.

I have some needs right now. I could make a list, a long list. I have forgotten that all I need is my faith in God. All I need is God. "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." There is a certain simplicity to faith. Simply believe. God didn't have to, but he has shown His credentials. He is faithful and He has shown us this through the ages. Manna from the sky and water from a rock. Lazarus raised from the dead, the parting of the Red Sea, feeding 5,000, calming the storm and creating the entire world...what more do I need!!?? I don’t see dead birds or other animals lying around in the snow as a result of the storm. God provided for their every need. Need after need has been met over and over again. The almighty God has shown Himself strong! And yet, I have to call myself "Ye" from time to time.

I am spending tomorrow in solitude in silence, realizing that I can, because God is in control of all things. Not me. He’ll get along without me just fine. I will meet with the One who is able to do immeasurably more than I could ask or imagine. I plan to show up with "Ye, myself and I" and be renewed from the inside out. God, I'm here to meet with you, come and meet with me.    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMb3xBsGiZU