I Blog Because...

I am a wife, a mom, a servant, a seeker and a follower of Christ. I am blogging to chronicle my own journey with God with the hope to inspire others to deepen their relationship with Him. Perhaps my mistakes and blunders will make you chuckle. Or, maybe, my disappointments, mistakes and learnings will speak to your heart. I often write at night, so forgive the grammatical mistakes and misspellings. This is a place for me to empty my mind and thoughts, with the hope of one day blessing my 2 girls with the raw honesty about life from their mom. I invite you to journey with me and share in my joys and sorrows as I seek to know my Lord. Proverbs 8:17 "I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me."



Monday, February 14, 2011

Seasonal Confusion

What an incredible winter day.  As I set my gaze upon my backyard, I can't help but take in the beauty of the day.  The sky is blue, the sun is shining and the temperature is an unusually warm 60 degrees on this Valentine's Day.   From the comfort of my Adirondack chair, I can see that the lawn remains covered with a blanket of white snow.  The covered area is receding as the rays of the sun reflect its warmth upon it.   It is a bit odd to sit in the warm sun, watch squirrels frolic together, listen to the sound of the remaining fallen leaves crackle against the ground in the wind and behold the sight of budding Bradford Pear trees --- all in one sitting in the middle of February. How awesome is our God?  This is the day the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it!  I must say, however, I am feeling a little seasonal confusion.

As I sit in the quiet of my sweet sabbath Monday, I am beginning to wonder which season I most associate with at the moment.   Is this is a season of spring, summer, winter or autumn in my faith walk and relationship with God?    If I can be quiet and still enough to take notice of the little things such as the sound of blowing leaves or a few squirrels scampering about the trees, might today be a good day to take notice of the subtleties occurring in my life.  

We often say things like, "I can't believe it's autumn already.  Where did the summer go?"   Or, we might say, I can't believe it's Christmas, where did the autumn go?"     Seasons seem to change so quickly, but subtle changes are happening all the while.   It is a process which takes time, with God's beautiful and perfect design.   We simply fail to take notice of the subtleties taking place all around us.     I think the same holds true for each one of us.   Little behaviors and habits slip in, or unhealthy choices begin to slowly infiltrate our lives.  All of sudden we find ourselves far away from God, in unhealthy relationships, using our tongues in ways we shouldn't or failing to care for own health.   Each of us can name our own undesired outcome.  Seasons do change, but there are minute changes happening all of the time which eventually bring us into an entirely new season.

As I sit here in the sun, listening to the wind chimes blow in the wind I feel an overwhelming sense of peace and comfort that God intends for me to feel seasonal confusion.    God is asking me to die to self each and everyday. Some habits and choices need a funeral in my life which are hindering what God wants to do in me.  He is calling me to a season of winter.   God is calling me to delight in Him, find my joy in Him, and crawl up in His lap under a tree and rest.  God is calling me to summer.    God is calling me to a time of preparation, self-examination, and to study His Word.   He is calling me to change and to allow Him to do some pruning and refining in my life.  Perhaps some leaves need to fall or change to a brilliant gold color.   God is calling me to a season of fall.   God is calling me to something new each and every day.  God is calling me to be as a budding flower and to be open to something new and beautiful He wants to do in and through me.   He wants to make all things new so that the  beautify of Christ can be seen and known.   God is calling me to spring.

February 14, 2011 is the perfect day.    What may appear as seasonal confusion is in actuality a beautiful reminder of the wonderful work God wants to do in our lives.   I think I'll sit here a while and take notice of the subtleties God brings to my mind.    "Search me O Lord, and mold me to reflect the beauty of Your Son in all seasons.   Amen."

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